It's always about Love.... with Tami Finseth

Sparks, Chemistry & Love at First Sight! Could these three coveted words be your first date sabotagers?

Love everybody wants it, yet why does it seem to elude so many of us? Should love be considered the eighth Wonder of the World? Is it really up there with The Great Pyramid of Giza or the Hanging Gardens of Babylon? Or is it that we as people have been brainwashed by all the romantic movies, the Disney Princesses and the visions of Cupids Bow hitting our hearts when our eyes lock with our beloveds? Has all of this closed off our minds and in turn our hearts to the potential of Love that is sitting right in front of us as we go through first date after first date? I believe love, attraction, chemistry... all of that, is something that builds over time. In our early 20's attraction is the ultimate captivator, it's what draws us together romantically. But, as we get older, learn more about life and the challenges that come with it, our list of what is important in a partner changes. Don't get me wrong, we all want to meet our soulmate, but the package that our soulmate arrives in is wrapped differently. We realize that looks grow with a great personality, that we'll gladly accept a half an inch shorter vs lack of integrity, and that being able to engage in an intelligent conversation versus being knocked off our feet upon "first sight" trumps everything. Isn't our vision of a true soulmate somebody who loves us unconditionally at our best, yet, still sees the best in us at our worst? Don't we want that somebody who makes us laugh just a little too hard, who makes us smile just at the sound of their text pinging our phone? Isn't our soul mate the person we can't live without, not just the one we can see ourselves living with? I think your true love, your soul mate, your happily ever after is that person you see yourself sitting next to in a rocking chair on your front porch when you're 90 years old looking at each other with a little twinkle in your eyes as you reminesce about life saying, "Oh yes, darling, I remember when." 

See, first dates aren't about your "happily ever afters." They're about getting to know someone, enjoying a meal, a laugh, and making a human connection. Stop sabotaging and looking for Cupid to show up, or fireworks to burst into color above their head, because in doing so, you may be letting your soul mate walk away as well as setting yourself up for constant disappoinment. Relax, enjoy, exhale and if you find yourself laughing, enjoying conversation and not realizing that two hours have passed by along with a great meal, set up a second date. Attraction grows, chemistry builds and desire is stirred. A relationship doesn't happen over night. Remember, if it starts with fireworks where does it have to go? Get to know someone, learn about them and give love a chance. Aren't you worth more than a single date? True love is found in the small steps, and it's not as elusive as you may think. So, come on, say yes to that second date. You won't be sorry. 

~Tami Heart

 

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